Hand and Thumb Gestures

10 min read

Overview

The hand has twenty-seven small bones and more nerve connections to the brain than any other body part, so the positions our hands take give powerful insight into emotional state. Because hands are usually held in front of the body, these signals are easy to see, and most people have several trademark hand positions they use repeatedly. The opening illustration is Jacques-Louis David's 1812 "Napoleon in His Study," showing the famous hand-tucked-in-waistcoat pose — popularly explained as a stomach ulcer, watch-winding, or a dozen other theories. The real origin is François Nivelon's 1738 A Book of Genteel Behavior, which described the hand-held-in posture as a stance of "breeding and manly boldness, tempered with modesty." Napoleon did not habitually use the gesture and never sat for the painting; David added it from memory because he understood the authority the hand-and-thumb position projects. (Napoleon was five feet four inches tall, yet viewers perceive the figure as over six feet.)

This topic catalogues the most common hand and thumb gestures in everyday use, the attitudes each reveals, and the decision rules for reading and correcting them.

Key takeaways

Mental model

Mental model

How the hands talk

For thousands of years, status determined who could hold the floor when speaking — in Roman times, a low-status person could be executed for interrupting Julius Caesar. In modern free-speech societies anyone can offer an opinion, even interrupting a president or prime minister (Tony Blair received a condescending slow handclap during a 2003 television discussion on the Iraqi crisis). In many cultures the hands act as "punctuation marks" that regulate turn-taking.

Hands Raised and turn-taking

The Hands Raised gesture is borrowed from the Italians and French, the biggest users of "hand talking," but it is rarely seen in England, where waving the hands while speaking is read as poor style. In Italy the rule is simple: the person with hands raised has the floor; the listener keeps hands down or behind the back. To get a word in, you raise your hands — by looking away and lifting them, or by touching the other person's arm to suppress their hand as you raise yours. What looks like friendly touching is often each party trying to restrict the other's hands and take the floor.

On the one hand: detecting bias

When a person summarizes both sides of a discussion, watch which hand carries which view. They hold one hand palm-up to articulate one set of points, then the other hand for the opposing points. Right-handed people reserve their favored point of view for the right hand; left-handers favor the left.

Gestures improve recall

Hand gestures grab attention and help listeners retain information. At the University of Manchester, Geoffrey Beattie and Nina McLoughlin had volunteers listen to stories featuring cartoon characters (Roger Rabbit, Tweetie Pie, Sylvester the Cat). For some listeners a narrator added gestures — hands moving up and down for running, a waving motion for a hair dryer, arms wide apart for a fat opera singer. Tested ten minutes later, those who saw the gestures scored up to a third higher on recall.

Rubbing the palms together

Rubbing the palms together communicates positive expectancy. The dice thrower rubs the dice between his palms expecting to win; the master of ceremonies rubs his palms saying "We have been looking forward to hearing our next speaker"; the salesperson rubs his palms announcing a big order. The waiter who rubs his palms asking "Anything else, sir?" is signalling expectancy of a good tip.

Speed signals who benefits

The speed of the rub signals who the gesturer thinks receives the benefit. A real estate agent who rubs his palms quickly while saying "I've got just the right house for you!" signals he expects the result to benefit you. The same words with a slow rub read as sneaky or devious — you sense the result is meant to benefit him, not you. Salespeople are taught to use a fast Palm-Rub when describing products so they do not put buyers on the defensive. A buyer who quickly rubs his palms saying "Let's see what you have to offer!" is expecting something good and may buy.

Author's argument: The speed of the hand rub, not the words, tells you whom the gesturer thinks will receive the benefit.

Read it in context

Always check context: a person rubbing his palms briskly at a cold bus terminal is warming his hands, not expecting a bus.

Thumb and finger rub

Rubbing the thumb against the index finger or fingertips is a money-expectancy gesture — its symbolism is rubbing a coin between thumb and fingertips. The street vendor uses it saying "I can save you 40 percent," as does the person asking "Can you lend me fifty dollars?" Any professional who deals with clients should avoid it at all times, because it carries negative associations about money.

Hands clenched together

At first this can look like confidence, since some people who use it also smile — but the Hands-Clenched gesture actually shows a restrained, anxious, or negative attitude. The authors observed a negotiator describing a deal he had just lost: as the story went on, his clenched fingers turned white and looked welded together. It is a favorite of Queen Elizabeth on royal visits and public appearances, usually positioned on her lap. Negotiation experts Nierenberg and Calero found it functions as a frustration gesture in negotiation, assumed by someone who feels they are not convincing the other party or are losing.

Three positions and a height rule

The gesture has three main positions:

  1. Hands clenched in front of the face (high / center).
  2. Hands clenched resting on the desk or lap (center / lower).
  3. When standing, hands clenched in front of the crotch (lower).

There is a correlation between height and frustration: the higher the hands are held, the more difficult the person is to deal with. A person with hands clenched high in a center position is harder than one with hands clenched low. As with all negative gestures, take action to unlock the fingers — offer a drink or ask them to hold something — or the negative attitude persists, just as it does with arm-crossing.

The Steeple

The Steeple is an exception to the rule that gestures must be read in clusters — it often occurs in isolation. The fingers of one hand lightly press against those of the other to form a church steeple, sometimes rocking back and forth "like a spider doing push-ups on a mirror." It is frequently seen in superior–subordinate interaction and indicates a confident, self-assured attitude — common among accountants, lawyers, and managers, and used by superiors giving instructions or advice. Some convert the steeple into a praying gesture to appear God-like (the book cites President Chirac and Gerry Adams). Because it can read as smugness or arrogance, avoid it when you want to be persuasive or win confidence.

Raised vs. Lowered Steeple

There are two versions:

  • Raised Steeple — assumed when the steepler is giving opinions or ideas, or is doing the talking.
  • Lowered Steeple — used when the steepler is listening rather than speaking. Women tend to use the Lowered Steeple more often. A Raised Steeple combined with the head tilted back takes on an air of smugness or arrogance.

The cluster determines the outcome

The Steeple is a positive signal but can occur in positive or negative circumstances. If it follows positive gestures (open palms, leaning forward, head up, nodding) and appears when you show the solution to a problem, you have likely been given the go-ahead to "ask for the order." If it follows negative gestures (arm folding, leg crossing, looking away, hand-to-face), the person is confident he won't say yes or can get rid of you. In both cases the steeple registers confidence — the preceding gestures are the key to the outcome.

Using steepling to win at chess

Rest your finger on a chess piece to indicate your intended move. If your opponent sits back and steeples, he is confident about that move — so do not make it. If he instead clenches his hands or crosses his arms, he dislikes the potential move — so make it.

The Face Platter

A positive courtship gesture, used mainly by women (and by gay men) to attract a man's attention: one hand is placed on top of the other and the face is "presented" as if on a platter for the man to admire. If you intend to use flattery — sincere or not — this gesture gives the green light for it.

Holding hands behind the back

The Duke of Edinburgh and other male members of the British Royal Family habitually walk with head up, chin out, and one hand holding the other behind the back. The Palm-in-Palm behind the back position is common among leaders, royalty, police on the beat, headmasters, and senior military — anyone in authority. The emotions are superiority, confidence, and power: the person exposes the vulnerable stomach, heart, crotch, and throat in a subconscious act of fearlessness. Taking this position in a high-stress situation (a press interview, waiting outside a dentist's surgery) makes you begin to feel confident and authoritative through cause and effect.

The firearm exception

Law-enforcement officers who do not wear firearms use this position regularly, often rocking on the balls of their feet to gain height. Officers who do wear firearms seldom use it — they let their arms hang at their sides or tuck their thumbs into the belt. The firearm supplies enough power that Palm-in-Palm is not a necessary display of authority.

Hand-Gripping-Wrist and Upper-Arm Grip

Gripping behind the back communicates a different emotion. The Hand-Gripping-Wrist gesture — one hand gripping the opposite wrist tightly behind the back — signals frustration and an attempt at self-control, as if one arm is restraining the other from striking out. The higher up the arm the hand grips, the greater the frustration or anger: gripping the upper arm (the Upper-Arm Grip) shows more self-control than gripping the wrist. This is the origin of the expression "Get a good grip on yourself." It is seen outside courtrooms between warring parties, in salespeople in reception areas, and in patients waiting for a doctor. If you catch yourself doing it, switch to Palm-in-Palm behind the back and you will feel more in control.

| Gesture | Attitude signalled | | --- | --- | | Palm-in-Palm behind back | Superiority, confidence, power | | Hand-Gripping-Wrist | Frustration, self-control | | Upper-Arm Grip | Greater frustration / anger; stronger self-control |

Thumb displays

Thumbs denote superiority. In palmistry they represent strength of character and the ego, and thumb signals show self-important attitudes. Thumbs display dominance, assertiveness, or sometimes aggression; they are secondary gestures, usually part of a cluster. Thumb displays are positive signals, typical of the "cool" individual showing superiority. A man uses Protruding Thumbs around women he is attracted to, and people in high-status or prestige clothing display their thumbs. You rarely see a low-status individual, such as a vagrant, do it. Displayers often rock on the balls of their feet to appear taller. (The book labels the waistcoat-tucked variant the "Waistcoat Thruster.")

Thumbs protruding from pockets

Thumbs-Protruding-from-Coat-Pocket is common to men and women who feel superior to others — cited as one of Prince Charles's regular gestures, revealing an in-control attitude. In a workplace, the boss walks around in this position; when the boss is away, the next-in-charge adopts it — but no subordinate would dare use it in front of the boss. Thumbs sometimes protrude from the back pockets instead, as if the person is trying to hide a dominant attitude. Women rarely used Thumb Displays until the 1960s, when trousers and more authoritative roles became common.

Contradictory and folded-arm clusters

Thumb displays become obvious when they contradict the words: the lawyer who says "In my humble opinion, ladies and gentlemen…" in a soft voice while displaying his thumbs and tilting his head back to look down his nose reads as insincere or pompous. To appear genuinely humble he should approach with his coat open, palms open, and stoop forward to appear smaller.

Arms-Folded-with-Thumbs-Pointing-Upward is a double signal: the folded arms show defensiveness, while the upward thumbs show superiority. The user typically gestures with his thumbs while talking and rocks on the balls of his feet.

Thumb-pointing as ridicule

The thumb pointed at another person signals ridicule or disrespect. The husband who points his thumb at his wife saying "She always nags" is inviting an argument; the shaking thumb is a pointer used to ridicule her. Thumb-pointing is especially irritating to most women when a man does it. The Thumb-Shaking gesture is uncommon among women, though they sometimes use it to point at people they dislike.

Author's argument: The thumb has signalled power and authority for thousands of years — in Roman times a thumb held up or down meant life or death to a gladiator — and people decode thumb signals intuitively, without any training.

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